The Uchiha Guide to Babysitting
by kimmykim45
Summary: Sasuke's back. His punishment? Babysitting. "If I kill any of them, it's on you," Sasuke sneered. Tsunade burst out into cackle-like laughter, "I'll take on that challenge, Uchiha, but for every child you kill, you owe the village population three more!" Sasuke shuddered, and he hoped he had enough self-control to kill less than two… Or else he was just downright screwed.
1. Prologue

** The Uchiha Guide to Babysitting**

Prologue

Now Sasuke was a stoic man who never showed his emotions, but when he heard the terrible news from the hokage, he couldn't help dropping his jaw in shock. Yes, that'sjust how bad she surprised him. "Babysitting," she had said, "Is your new punishment."

Babysitting!_ Babysitting?! _That had to be the most absurd idea he had ever heard in his entire lifetime and he had heard some pretty stupid ideas in his life, especially from Naruto. A second later, he recomposed himself and bore into Tsunade's eyes with his own. "I refuse," He stated bluntly.

The hokage quirked an eyebrow amusedly at his answer, leaning onto her elbows on her desk, she clasped her hands together and stared at him as intensely as he was at her. "Listen closely, Sasuke. I'm sorry, but you don't have a choice. The council has made up their mind and so have I."

"The council said 1000 hours of community service was fine!" Sasuke said as he narrowed his eyes at the pale-blond hokage. "More specifically, _missions _were fine. I refuse to babysit a bunch of noisy kids."

Tsunade frowned mockingly. "You seem to be just as noisy right now, Sasuke." The man scowled. "I suggest you keep quiet and get started on your hours."

Sasuke glared heatedly at the authoritative woman, his chest heaved as he seethed with anger. "Why?" He all but hissed. Seriously, the community service was fine, the 1000 hours was fine, but 1000 hours of _babysitting_ was just too much.

"Oh. You want a reason for the sudden change?" Tsunade smirked sadistically. "It's because, Uchiha, I may be merciful enough to talk the Council out of giving you the death sentence, but I still like to have some fun of my own."

"So you're restricting me to just babysitting so you can get some entertainment out of it?" Sasuke asked, exasperated, before his expression darkened. "You realize I hate kids with a burning passion."

Tsunade continued to smirk. "That makes it all the more entertaining! But if you don't think you can handle it, feel free to try to find someone to help you. You start tomorrow at the Konoha daycare from six in the morning until closing time. You have a year to complete your hours, which should be more than enough time considering there are 8760 hours a year. Now, get out. I have paperwork to do."

Sasuke felt like he was about to blow any second, but instead, he wiped his face clean of emotion – he wasn't about to let the hokage have the pleasure of seeing his inner fury! Walking out of her office as calmly as he could – meaning he was moving stiffly to refrain from stomping – he opened the door to see Sakura standing outside.

When she saw him, she smiled in greeting, which was a relief because he wasn't sure if he could take on a fangirling Sakura without exploding. Nodding slightly to acknowledge her presence, he turned towards Tsunade one last time and snarled, "If I kill any of them, it's on you," before continuing down the hall.

But before he was out of hearing range, he heard Tsunade burst out into cackle-like laughter and yelled from her office, "I'll take on that challenge, Uchiha, but for every child you kill, you owe the village population three more!"

Sasuke shuddered, and he hoped he had enough self-control to kill less than three… Or else he was just downright screwed.

xXx

Five minutes later, Sasuke stood in front of the hokage tower, chatting with Naruto. Well actually, they weren't really chatting, it was more like glaring and laughing; Naruto was laughing at Sasuke's misfortune and Sasuke was attempting to murder him with his looks. But no matter how deadly the look he wore, his best friend just would not shut up! Sliding his hand over his face in irritation, Sasuke wasn't sure how much more he could take before he would switch from using his looks to his hands to kill.

Fortunately for him, he would not be charged with first degree murder that day because Naruto's laughter finally died down a little. But to his horror, the blond ran into the crowded streets and pulled out a little boy, dragging him over to Sasuke.

"What are you doing, dobe? That's kidnapping!" Sasuke said, alarm ringing in his head. He knew Naruto was crazy, but surely he wasn't crazy enough to just take random children from the street, right?

Noticing the questioning look from Sasuke, Naruto quickly explained himself, his hand still on the collar of the little boy's shirt. "He was alone already, teme! We can help him get home in a second, so keep your voice down!" He looked to and fro, checking whether anybody overheard their exchange, before he turned back to the boy, his voice raising, "Hey kid, sorry about that. Anyways, I just wanted to tell you to talk to your parents about Konoha daycare –" Sasuke's eyes narrowed at his bastard of a friend and refrained himself from strangling him. "It's a very fun place with lots of toys and games!" Naruto pointed at Sasuke, whose eye twitched. "This guy works there too now, so you can play with him all you want!" The boy looked over at Sasuke with a blank face. Sasuke figured he should at least fake a small smile at the kid, but it looked more like a grimace.

"Not to mention," Naruto continued, "There's a really pretty lady who works there in the morning." He smirked at the kid, whose attention was refocused on the blond. Sasuke inwardly shook his head. As if the kid would want to a daycare just to see some pretty lady! Peering at the kid from the corner of his eye, he realized that the boy had been extremely quiet (and calm) the entire time. Perhaps he was like the Uchiha – emotionless and uncaring, in which case was too bad for him, but if it was true, then the boy would not go to the daycare at all.

Wanting to end the conversation, Sasuke turned away and was about to ask the child where his home was, but the boy spoke first, "I'll come." He heard footsteps come closer to him, before the child spoke again. "I'll bring my older brother and maybe my big sister too." He paused, seeming to contemplate something. "She likes dark-haired guys."

Sasuke tensed at once and the boy looked up at him innocently, though his face had yet to show emotion. The Uchiha was going to get three more kids to babysit_ and _another fan girl. He heard Naruto laughing behind him, and all Sasuke could think about was how on earth he would survive 1000 hours of babysitting and how maybe he really _would_ commit first degree murder that day.

Damn it all.

**Author's Note**

Extremely short, but this is just an idea. This is my first Naruto fanfic, so I'm testing the waters by writing this fic. I have more of the plot planned out just in case I get positive feedback for this story. If anyone thinks I should continue, please leave a review or fave/follow and I will post the next chapter, which will have Sasuke actually start babysitting. Thank you, readers, for taking the time to read my story! :)


	2. Chapter One

**The Uchiha Guide to Babysitting**

Chapter One

_At the age of thirteen, Sasuke Uchiha, the sole survivor of the Uchiha clan massacre aside from the mass murdered himself, abandoned his home and friends, causing them to search desperately for him for years. However, no matter how hard they tried to bring him back home, he would only go back on his own accord. After three long years, Sasuke Uchiha gathered enough strength and power to kill both a legendary sannin and his prodigal brother until finally returning to the place he used to call home. The other members of Team Hebi had followed him of course, and with him, they were arrested the moment they approached the gates of Konoha. They were separated, imprisoned, and interrogated for days before two particular members of Team Seven were permitted to see the Uchiha and persistently vouch for his and his team's freedom._

_It took a few weeks of Naruto's loud protests and Sakura's logical reasoning to get the job done, but they both agreed the time they spent was worth it. Of course, Team Hebi was to willingly give answers to any question they were asked in the interrogation room, which they had been doing already. Afterwards, Sasuke Uchiha would have to complete a thousand hours of community service in exchange for a life back in Konoha, whereas the rest of Team Hebi would be let off with 500 hours due to them being less-than-S-rank criminals. Originally, the community service hours were meant to be spent on missions – they, being high-ranking ninjas serving Konoha, would be beneficial. But alas, the Konoha Daycare ran short on volunteers and barely any citizens in the village trusted the traitorous Uchiha. Thus, Tsunade, being the person with the most power in the village, endowed the responsibility of babysitting children at the daycare to no one other than Sasuke Uchiha, giving him the chance to regain the trust of civilians, complete his service hours, and suffer a "little" while doing it. _

xXx

On his way to the Konoha Daycare at five thirty in the morning, Sasuke felt only two things:

He felt downright ridiculous.

And quite embarrassed.

But instead of ducking his head from stares as he walked towards the daycare, he had sent withering glares at anyone who dared look him in the eye – not that many people looked him in the eye at all; his dark aura already had everyone plastering their gazes to the ground. Even his early-rising fan girls couldn't help but stay at least a foot away from the man instead of gluing themselves onto him.

So, the Uchiha prodigy trudged down the streets reluctantly until he stood in front of the nice, little building every Leaf citizen knew as Konoha Daycare. He took a deep breath in and wondered if he should just turn back and go home, maybe negotiate with the sadistic hokage for a new punishment. Sasuke scoffed inwardly. As if Tsunade would even bother to listen to him. Feeling unbelievably irked, Sasuke wiped his face clean of emotion, something he perfected with long years of practice, before he took a step forward and opened the double doors to the daycare. Bells chimed as the doors opened, signalling his arrival; there was no turning back now.

The moment he walked in, the overwhelming smell of cleaning products caused his stride to falter slightly before he stopped entirely in the middle of the daycare. As he waited for someone to greet him, he took the time to look around.

While on the outside the daycare appeared petite, the interior of the building was quite spacious. From what he could see, the daycare was mainly one long rectangular room with several doors leading to a kitchen, washroom, infirmary, and a door labelled "NAP ROOM". Surrounding him were miniature chairs and tables of art supplies, a toy house and kitchen, and a square carpet with bookshelves and toy chests. Overall, it was a decent daycare and it reminded him vaguely of the times he would play with his own toys as a child, or at least, before the massacre. He shook his head at the uninvited thoughts but immediately stopped when he heard bells chime as the double doors opened behind him. He tensed instantly. That had to be a child. A _child_. It's not like he was scared of the child, per se, but he was definitely scared of killing them by "accident" and then he would never be able to live a non-high-profile life. Oh kami, how he wanted to just disappear.

Turning around slowly to greet the patrons, he was surprised when he saw a small figure he had seen so many times before: Sakura, but with an extra two cups of coffee. That was the second time she surprised him that week! He scowled slightly at her presence. Sasuke knew that she wouldn't annoy him like she did as a pre-teen, but being around her still reminded him of those days and that gave him a headache.

The moment she noticed him, she smiled. It was the kind of smile a housewife would give when she saw that her husband had come home, reminding him of his mother and father instantly. Again shaking the thoughts of his past out of his head, he gave her a small nod of acknowledgement. She spoke first.

"Good morning, Sasuke! You're here early." She walked over to head and held out a cup of coffee. "I went to get these after I arrived and unlocked the doors. I would've been back early enough to greet you, but the lineup was long today."

"I don't drink coffee," he said in response. He half-expected her to pout as she used to do when they were kids, but she just gave him a sage look.

"I usually don't either," she replied, a hint of amusement in her voice. "But if you don't then you're going to be worn out before the morning is even over and I know that you'll be staying for more than just that."

Frowning, Sasuke reluctantly took the offered coffee and furrowed his brows.

"You don't _have to_ drink it, you know, and it's not like it's poisoned or anything, so you don't need to glare at it like that." He could hear by the way she spoke that she was enjoying herself through her incessant teasing. He wasn't pleased.

"Hn." Raising the cup to his lips, Sasuke took a small sip and almost wrinkled his nose with distaste. Was babysitting going to be so hard that drinking coffee is necessary to keep his energy up? He could run for miles without faltering and train from dusk to dawn, for goodness sake, and babysitting was going to be _even more tiring_ than all of that?!

The girl smiled in response. "So how have you been doing, Sasuke? I haven't seen you around much since you were let out of custody last month. I would have visited, but the hokage kept me at my busiest."

Sasuke eyed the wall clock as he took another sip. "Okay." There was only five minutes before they would officially open and he braced himself by finishing up his coffee.

From the corner of his eye, he saw Sakura stare off at the clock too. He supposed it was because his reply ended the conversation too quickly for her tastes. She was always a talkative person. But she knew that _he_ wasn't, much less in the morning, so there was really no need to have that look on her face.

"Miryuki should be coming." He heard her mumble to herself before turning to him and gesturing towards his cup. "Do you want me to throw that away for you?"

"Hn." She took the coffee cup from him and threw it away with hers into a tiny garbage can in the corner of the room – something that escaped his sight before. Sakura must have known the daycare well if she knew where the miniscule garbage can was. Letting curiosity get the best of him, he asked, "Why are you even here?"

Well, that sounded rude. Sure, it was universally known that he was a cold person, but he didn't want to be _too_ rude to his old teammate (no matter how annoying she could be sometimes), right?

Thankfully, Sakura responded normally. "Tsunade told me to watch over you for the next couple of days, but I'm usually here until ten anyway before someone else takes over."

The words flew out of his mouth before he even processed them. "I don't want your help."

"Don't let your pride get the best of you, Sasuke." Was all Sakura said before the sound of bells chiming could be heard. Sasuke was angered by what she said, but was quickly forgotten when a young girl stampeded across the daycare, stopping beside him.

Suddenly, Sasuke felt anxious. What was the girl going to do? Why was she staring up at him like that? He looked at Sakura briefly for some assistance, but saw that she was busy signing sheets with the girl's mother. Sensing movement from the child, he automatically activated his Sharingan and jumped backwards, out of the girl's reach.

He saw the girl freeze with her arm outstretched – probably about to touch him – when she widened her big brown eyes and her lips began to tremble. Sasuke quirked an eyebrow in incredulity at the sight. She was about to cry! It hadn't even been a minute since she entered the building and she was already tearing up because of him. What was he supposed to do?! He only knew how to make people cry, not make them stop!

From behind him, he heard the girl's mother bid her farewell before leaving, relieving him of some tension. At least now he wasn't going to be reported to the hokage for making a kid cry. But the relief was short-lived, because the girl started bawling and ran towards Sakura. Immediately, the kunoichi picked up the child and cradled her in her arms. "What's wrong, hun?" She asked, concerned. "You never cry when your momma leaves."

"There's a man with scary red eyes!" The girl wailed, burying her face in Sakura's hair. Sakura's gaze averted to Sasuke's as she narrowed her eyes. He remained undeterred under her eventual glare, but switched off his Sharingan when the child's wails got louder. Even so, Sakura kept glaring and he decided that she just wanted him to leave the room for the moment.

Choosing to go into the "NAP ROOM", Sasuke closed the door behind him and peered at the pair from the glass pane in the door. He watched as Sakura put the girl down, who appeared to be calming down, and ruffled her hair affectionately. Sasuke made a note-to-self to never activate his Sharingan in front of children who didn't know about his bloodline limit. Hoping that Sakura or the little girl wouldn't hold a grudge against him – not that he cared either way – Sasuke waited as the pair had a small conversation before he saw Sakura nod at him, signalling that he was allowed back into the playroom.

Walking back into the room awkwardly, Sasuke eyed the little girl, who returned his gaze hesitantly as he moved towards her. Feeling like he should say something, he decided to go for the obvious, "I'm here to take care of you so don't be scared."

The girl, who was holding Sakura's hand, wavered at his words but wasn't entirely convinced by him. Sasuke sighed. "Look, kid, I'm here to look after you, so you might as well get used to me." He paused before adding, "But not too close."

Sakura shot him a look for that last part, but the girl seemed to trust him then. "Okay!" She exclaimed, smiling brightly. "Let's go play!" And with that, she reached for Sasuke's hand – he resisted pulling away or activating his Sharingan that time – and grasped two of his fingers, practically dragging him to a table.

Sasuke whipped his head around to look at Sakura for help. He didn't want to play with children! He was only planning to do simple tasks like opening juice boxes or sharpening pencil crayons – NOT playing! Much to his chagrin, Sakura just shrugged and smirked at him. _Damn her._ He could tell by the gleam in her eyes that she would enjoy this experience even more than the hokage that planned it. He glanced at the clock then and saw only five minutes had passed since the workday began. Sasuke let out another sigh.

5 minutes down, 59995 to go.

**Author's Note**

This concludes the very first chapter of _The Uchiha Guide to Babysitting_! I'm sorry it took me so long to update. I'm in an extremely busy point in my life right now, so please understand that I can't always find the time to write. I'm hope I have appeased you all for now and I will be back with another update hopefully within this month! The next chapter will start going into more depth about babysitting and Sasuke's awkward reactions, hehe. ALSO, thank you _so_ much to everyone who reviewed, favourited, or followed the story. It means a lot to me and it keeps me motivated to continue writing! To be honest, I would have ditched the story if it weren't for all of you, so thank you, really. And continue to give me feedback; I am open to constructive criticism and your thoughts and opinions. Until next time~


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